((Everything about this place worries me, Astral. But at some point, you can't worry about it all actively, or you'll panic yourself into a heart attack--not literally, but. You have to let some worries not be active worries all the time.
And besides, the system gives us some tiny bit of control here. I'm glad for that.))
If Astral had eyebrows, he'd knit them together into a scarf with what Coda says-thinks, but he doesn't, so he stares a bit harder at their device instead. Focus on one worry-- one problem-- at a time. How many times has he told Yuma the same back on Earth? How strange to hear someone give him the very same advice.
When Coda then says they're glad for the tiny bit of control, Astral realizes something, but he can't quite scratch the surface as to what it is. Why is that so familiar to him? Absentmindedly, he writes a code into his own device, only for it to execute a small hologram of a bright blue star. His home star.
Coda leans in to look closer at the star, letting out a soft sigh. ((That's beautiful. Where is that?)) They're sure it's real, not just the product of his imagination--Astral doesn't seem to be an environmental designer type, to them.
((It's my planet's sun.)) He tweaks the code further to show Coda the star's planetary system. Not too far from the blue star is a smaller, half broken planet. His home.
((Coda, have you committed a crime?)) Their shirt...
Coda doesn't immediately understand what he's referring to. I mean, yes, they have done crimes but...oh, wait, queer shirt may not translate.
((The shirt is a reference to the saying 'be gay, do crime'. It's a bit of black humor based on the fact that queer people are a marginalized group, and the governing bodies of various countries, states, cities have tried to outlaw queerness in different forms. Gay marriage wasn't legalized in all states until 2015, for example.))
Admittedly, Astral doesn't understand much of what Coda says. If he could remember anything about himself than the most basic, then he'd be far more familiar, but he cannot, and in many ways he's better for it. As he is now, he thinks it's cruel to criminalize a group of people. He continues to fiddle with the code for his little hologram without much thought, fingers itchy for something to do. Did someone treat Coda like they were a criminal for being different?
((Then are you queer? I thought you were a Changeling.)) Unless it's possible to be both?
((One doesn't preclude the other. Queer is about sexuality and gender and...the sense that one isn't fitting neatly into the 'normal' boxes for either of those categories. Like, I'm agender. I'm not a boy, I'm not a girl, I'm not really anything in that area. I'm just...queer.))
It's hard to explain, but Coda's glad they don't need to try to unfold their sexuality in order to illustrate.
((Neither boy or girl...)) Astral mulls the thought over as he plays with his little hologram some more.
Familiar, that thought, though not in the way Coda describes, no, but familiar all the same. He certainly thought something similar before about how different he was compared to Yuma or Kotori. He is not a boy like Yuma; he is not a girl like Kotori. What is he then? "Agender?" Like Coda? Would that be accurate for something like him? Yet another question about his identity where he simply doesn't have the answer.
((I suppose I am the same: neither. I must admit I'm uncertain if that's even accurate.))
((It's...hard to explain these things. Especially when you're explaining to someone experiencing their absence. I know some people feel very strongly that they're a boy or a girl. Some even feel strongly enough to change, if they weren't raised as the right one. It's okay not to know, though--on some level I recognize the concept may not even apply to you at all back home, just some homocentric ideology...))
((Do not fret over such details, Coda. I may not know much about myself, so I cannot deny that it may not apply to me, but you've still taught me something new-- you've taught me many new things.
I wonder if we can rebuild this world, can we rebuild ourselves?))
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And besides, the system gives us some tiny bit of control here. I'm glad for that.))
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When Coda then says they're glad for the tiny bit of control, Astral realizes something, but he can't quite scratch the surface as to what it is. Why is that so familiar to him? Absentmindedly, he writes a code into his own device, only for it to execute a small hologram of a bright blue star. His home star.
((I think I understand why you would be glad.))
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((Coda, have you committed a crime?)) Their shirt...
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((The shirt is a reference to the saying 'be gay, do crime'. It's a bit of black humor based on the fact that queer people are a marginalized group, and the governing bodies of various countries, states, cities have tried to outlaw queerness in different forms. Gay marriage wasn't legalized in all states until 2015, for example.))
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((Then are you queer? I thought you were a Changeling.)) Unless it's possible to be both?
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It's hard to explain, but Coda's glad they don't need to try to unfold their sexuality in order to illustrate.
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Familiar, that thought, though not in the way Coda describes, no, but familiar all the same. He certainly thought something similar before about how different he was compared to Yuma or Kotori. He is not a boy like Yuma; he is not a girl like Kotori. What is he then? "Agender?" Like Coda? Would that be accurate for something like him? Yet another question about his identity where he simply doesn't have the answer.
((I suppose I am the same: neither. I must admit I'm uncertain if that's even accurate.))
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I wonder if we can rebuild this world, can we rebuild ourselves?))